The Other Side of Every Fear is Freedom

Where do you feel stuck? You’re stuck if you have a decision you need to make and haven’t yet. The dissonance created in your mind is uncomfortable. One side of you knows you need to do it, and the other is hesitant.

Listening to your fears instead of your strengths creates stuckness.

Say you feel stuck in your career. You delay putting in your notice, not finding a new job panics you. What if your new boss is as demanding?

Fear always feels real, but it’s not always true. 

Fear always has a purpose. All emotions do.

Remember, emotions are the data lifeline to our brain, and they literally keep us alive. 

Try this: sit quietly and bring to mind a current fear. Gently ask it...

What purpose do you have for me? 

How are you keeping me safe?

How are you serving me? 

If you get quiet and inquire, an answer will appear. 

Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now, we are okay. Today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously.

Thich Nhat Hanh

Why is it difficult to deal with fear? Maybe as a kid, it was downplayed to you. You fell off our bike, and a parent responded, “you’re okay!” You needed to hear, “Was that scary for you?” Or society told you to “man up.” Or school taught you to do math but not how to handle your emotions. 

Repressing fear is like keeping a beach ball underwater, and it’s bound to pop up with force. Holding in fear manifests as anxiety or stress. It shows up as pain and sickness. 

Breathwork is a way to feel your fears. It teaches you how to recognize and befriend them. Perhaps even release fear. The intent is not to rid an emotion. That doesn’t work well. But when we practice feeling our emotions  – they can naturally subside. 

To feel better, get better at feeling.

American culture has a feeling problem. Many of us don’t feel our feelings. We don’t feel safe in our bodies. Then we spend hours absorbing others’ fear and outrage on social media. If you were out to lunch with a friend and she spilled a drink in your lap, would you just sit there? Or would you try and clean it up? It’s the same idea if someone spills their fears on you. Do you just sit there and let it all land on you? Or do you wipe it away?

Discernment comes from distinguishing between our fears and someone else’s.

We practice discernment by getting quiet with our fears. 

I have learned over the years that when one's mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear.

Rosa Parks

And by breathing into them. It’s natural to have fears. It’s not natural for our bodies to read frightening bits on social media and news sites for hours. Our brains were not built for that. 

Our ancestors did not sit around the campfire and read about the fears from all around the world. This shit is unnatural. Humans have never been exposed to this much information before. Humans have never had this much imagery to alarm us before.

It makes sense why we feel terrified today. 

We must question these fears to know if they are ours.

We must seek the purpose behind our fears to learn more about ourselves. 

We must give our bodies silence and breaks to feel our fears. 

Want to try it?

Breathe with me today.

Ultimately we know deeply that the other side of every fear is freedom. Marilyn Ferguson